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Meditation last night was… interesting. I found myself experiencing a range of visual things, which isn’t something I’ve ever really had before. I expect it was because I was very tired, ha ha! Probably also because I’d missed a couple of nights, after 15 nights meditating in a row.

For most of the ten minutes (I know, quite short still) I was in my usual basic meditation mode, focusing on my breath. I tend to sigh the breath, both in and out, for about the first 5 minutes. I find this brings me into a state of deep relaxation, and works as a really noticeable contrast to the silence which follows, when I just breath freely.

Once I made this switch last night, I became aware of my cat sitting on the arm of the sofa beside me. His body to my right formed a shape in my mind, kind of a scratchy scribbly blue ball like a child’s drawing of a cloud or bush or something, all movement, whirring and turning in time to his gentle purrs. I don’t think this was any more than a subconscious visualisation based on the fact I knew he was there, but I allowed my attention to rest on it for a while.

Shortly afterwards, an image of the Milky Way as seen in this video came into my mind… turning silently overhead. My head started to slip back… back… until after a minute or so’s movement my head was looking straight up, watching the stars and the rest of the galaxy drift across the imagined sky. After I reached the “zenith”, I let my head sink back down, then… ping! The bell sounded, and I brought myself back to the room.

So far my experiences of meditation have been based solely around blankness – a state of non-being more than experiencing visualisations, beyond perhaps a slightly conscious one I sometimes use, of thoughts like clouds drifting across the face of a mountain. I had a feeling of tremendous well-being to think that yes, the Milky Way is drifting past overhead. Yes, there is life and energy and Force in my beautiful stupid little cat. I don’t believe I “saw” the Force, simply that some part of my brain translated that connection in a visual way.

It was really nice. I would never “try” for it, but should it happen again I’ll be very happy.


Well, it’s official – I’ve just been apprenticed to my first choice of Teaching Master 😀

I’ve only been speaking to her for a few days now, but we’ve covered a lot of ground in a short time. As I mentioned to the Pastor of our Temple, whilst we have a lot in common, I feel that we’re different in a lot of ways… meaning there’s much I can learn from her.

I couldn’t be happier. May the Force be with you all.

Some excellent news coming soon, but I can say no more. It’s been an exceptional week. 😀

*straightens face* There is no Emotion; there is Peace…


Poem in Lastbench February 2014

I’ve just found out my poem Þingvellir is being published in the Feb 2014 issue of Lastbench. I’m thrilled! My first published poem!

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As some of you will know, I’m quite keen to become apprenticed to a knight and continue my training with a teacher/mentor/partner. Well, tonight someone approached me to see what I’d think about becoming their apprentice.

The truth is unfortunately, I don’t think we’d be the best match. He’s a great guy, a wise and stout knight. Honestly he’d make someone a wonderful master… just not me. The truth is I just don’t think we have enough in common for it to be a good match, unlike some others at the Temple.

It’s awkward to let someone you respect down, but I hope I have done so whilst showing him that respect. As I said to him, I only get to be an apprentice once. I need to be sure I’m going to be tested, and that the “fit” is right.

I was advised by several Knights not to accept the first offer I got unless it felt right, and in truth this wasn’t even close to an offer as such… but even so, much better to be honest up front. It does feel strange to decline such a flattering interest, especially when it’s something I want.

In time, the Force will provide.

As part of my Jedi path, I need to do some work to get my body back into good shape. A Jedi is no use to anyone if he isn’t fit enough to serve, and Jedi believe body and mind are the same – without a healthy body we can’t live a healthy life.

As such, I’ve just made a commitment to complete an introductory course with a local running club. I used to run semi-regularly but I’ve never managed to keep the habit up for very long.

Ideally I’d like to run in the mornings, either every day or on regular days a week.